Quick Notes from the video that you can use to follow along:
What if I get aroused?
Here are some common feelings?
There’s a natural body rhythm… body energy that moves in new directions. When energy flows… and blood flows… the body may respond.
TO AN ERECTION:
This is healthy!! This is normal.
1ST, we need to normalize erections in non-sexual places.
Erections happen for many reasons and many penis-owners have them even outside of a sexual response.
And yes, it happens in a cuddling session.
2ND, it’s also a privilege. Not all penis-owners have them. Let’s celebrate erections!
[side note… not everyone gets erections, & that’s ok, too. People without erections have the opportunity to learn new ways of connecting that don’t require them which may make cuddling an easy transition... possibly greater emotional intelligence.]
3RD, conditioned. Many of us don’t receive much touch and when we have, it’s been in a sexual context. So we’ve conditioned our body to experienced arousal with touch… anticipating the stuff that comes after cuddling! No wonder we have erections with touch! It’s what we’ve trained our body to do.
AND WE CAN RETRAIN THE BODY!
QUESTION: ARE THERE CUDDLE POSITIONS THAT ARE SEXUAL?
It’s all about intent… none are explicitly sexual.
This is a clothed experience by the way… there are reasons for that!
SO WHAT DO WE DO? AS SOMEONE ELSE PUT IT, WHAT IF I’M POKED? LMAO
1st, We’re okay with it.
2nd, I look at more than just an erection to indicate if anything needs to happen. I look at the rest of the body. Hands, breath, body gyrations.
3rd, We can change stuff up. Position? Conversation change? Find deeper relaxation in another way?
LEARNING CURVE!! We’re learning new ways of relating, connecting & touching! I give everyone a break.
PRO TIP: CONDOM FOR PRECUM
Cuddling isn’t for everyone. Not everyone wants non-sexual touch, & that’s fine.
There’s a segment of the population… a sweet spot client I look for that understands what cuddling is all about.
There are other touch services available… therapeutic massage, erotic massage, medical services, and escort work. Please reach out to those individuals if you’re needing something more than cuddling.
OR include cuddling to your other practices.
HOW TO KNOW IF CUDDLING IS FOR YOU…
IF you want to experience and learn about non-sexual touch… learn something NEW about yourself.
IF you don’t need the pressure, expectations, and performance that sex requires. You can be you. You can be in the moment, and you can’t do it wrong as long as you’re asking for what you want, hearing a YES from me and staying in the non-sexual realm.